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Wicked Wicker: Enlistment bonus scandal is a great thing for America’s youth Columns Featured Scandal 

Wicked Wicker: Enlistment bonus scandal is a great thing for America’s youth

(GREED) – The Department of Defense is screwing a bunch of troops who put their asses on the line in Afghanistan and Iraq. DOD is making them repay enlistment bonuses worth tens of thousands of dollars each. Troops who were literally blown to pieces are having their credit ruined, their reputations destroyed, and the lives upturned because of DOD’s collection efforts. I personally think this is wonderful.

Basically, the recruiters lied to these kids, put them in for enlistment bonuses that far exceeded what they qualified for, sent them off to the meat-grinder, and then once DOD got what they needed from them: fuck you, pay it back. This needs to be front page news for every paper in the country.

Every high school senior needs to see it. Why? Because that’s what recruiters do. They’re liars. I’ve done some pretty horrible things for this country. I’ve maimed, killed, kidnapped, destabilized entire countries just for money, but even I couldn’t bring myself to be a recruiter and give a bunch of false promises to kids. I still had a little too much of my soul left.  If there’s one message I could get out to seniors thinking of joining, it’s to remember that you are nothing from the second you hit the gate. You’re a bullet sponge. All the talk of taking care of our own only applies to the men and women in your unit. Command will fuck you at the first chance they get.

The government doesn’t care about you and the country doesn’t care about you if it requires anything more than putting a bumper sticker on their car. They’ll all say “thank you for your service” when you’re in uniform, but when you’re on the street and broke because the “greatest military in the world” screwed you, they won’t even look you in the eye. They certainly won’t call their representative.

If you’re joining the military today, it should be for one reason and one reason alone: to get the training. Other than that, it’s a worthless career track. Your benefits will be reduced. Your retirement will be reduced. You’ll be forced to repay money you were promised. You aren’t even serving your country anymore. You’re serving a bunch of paid-off corrupt worms inside DC and their stooges in the Pentagon. There is nothing patriotic about serving in the military anymore. It’s just a job. It’s a job where the employer will kill you, disavow you, or leave you behind to win some political points.

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